Understanding and Managing Your Emotions
In the video above, Marc Brackett, Ph.D., founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence and creator of the Mood Meter, shares powerful insights on emotional intelligence and how we can better understand and work with our feelings.
Emotions influence nearly every decision we make, every relationship we have, and every goal we pursue. Yet most of us were never taught how to recognize, label, or regulate them effectively. This page expands on the ideas from the video and shows how the Mood Meter and the RULER approach give you practical tools to turn emotional awareness into real-life results.
Why Emotional Intelligence Matters
Research from the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence shows that people who develop strong emotion skills tend to:
- Make clearer decisions under pressure
- Build stronger, more supportive relationships
- Perform better at school and work
- Experience greater well-being and resilience
The good news? These skills are learnable at any age.
The Mood Meter: A Simple Tool for Emotional Clarity
One of the most practical tools Marc Brackett developed is the Mood Meter. It maps emotions along two dimensions:
- Energy (high to low)
- Pleasantness (unpleasant to pleasant)
These two axes create four color-coded quadrants:
- Red – High energy + unpleasant (anger, anxiety, frustration)
- Blue – Low energy + unpleasant (sadness, fatigue, discouragement)
- Green – Low energy + pleasant (calm, contentment, relaxation)
- Yellow – High energy + pleasant (excitement, joy, enthusiasm)
By regularly checking in with the Mood Meter, you build the foundational skills of recognizing and labeling emotions — the first steps toward better regulation.
The RULER Approach
The Mood Meter is part of the broader RULER framework developed by Brackett and his colleagues:
- Recognizing emotions in yourself and others
- Understanding the causes and consequences of emotions
- Labeling emotions with precision
- Expressing emotions appropriately
- Regulating emotions effectively
When these five skills are practiced consistently, people gain more choice in how they respond to life’s challenges instead of reacting automatically.
Practical Next Steps
- Watch the video above and notice which ideas resonate most with you.
- Try a quick Mood Meter check-in right now: How much energy do you feel? How pleasant or unpleasant is that feeling?
- Explore the Mood Meter tools and resources available on this site.
- Consider reading Marc Brackett’s books Permission to Feel and Dealing with Feeling for a deeper dive into these skills.
Start Building Your Emotional Skills Today
Emotional intelligence is not about controlling or eliminating feelings. It’s about understanding them and using them wisely. The Mood Meter and RULER approach give you a clear, research-backed path to do exactly that.
Watch the video, practice the tools, and begin building the emotional skills that support better relationships, clearer thinking, and a more intentional life.